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May 30-June 5, 2002 the bell curve The Bell CurveCity Paper's weekly gauge of Philly's Quality of Life A newborn baby boy is found alive in trash bag in Germantown. Unfortunately, a Dumpster diver had already spray-painted the infant silver and glued him to a lamppost before realizing the mistake. Minus 3 The Convention Center hosts Miss Pennsylvania Senior America, a pageant focusing on inner beauty of older women. Dick Clark jumps at chance to fuck beauty pageant contestants without pesky pregnancy risk. Even Former PGW exec gets six to 25 months in jail for embezzling $47,000. With only four explosions, however, he's still the most worthy choice for PGW's Employee of the Month. Plus 1 With Operation Safe Streets in place, Mayor Street declares: "There will be no major city that has safer communities than we have in our city. Because the city wage tax will force us to do most of our crime in the suburbs." Plus 1 Officials announce that next fall, violent offenders will be ejected from Philly schools more quickly. This way they're already outside and set to jump the good kids walking home from school. Plus 1 A developer contemplates replacing parking lots and abandoned warehouses on 31st Street near Girard with 176 townhomes and condos. "Or a big crater," says developer. "Either one." Plus 2 Six Philly neighborhoods chosen in plan to promote city living. In other news, Fishtown will be paved over. Even Television journalist Beverly Williams sues KYW-TV for race, sex and age discrimination. Colleague Larry Kane asserts, "I have experienced no such discrimination. Can you believe it?!" Minus 1 Total pluses: 5 Total minuses: 4 Score for the week: 1 Last week’s score: 22 | ||||||||||||||||||
