Starving Artists' Monologue Slam

Wed., April 12, 7 p.m., $10, Fergie's Pub, 1214 Sansom St., 215-525-1551

If you're not afraid of hanging above the gutter (that's what the HATG in HATG Theater Company stands for), gather your balls and head to Fergie's for this once-a-month slam.

Here's the deal: You have to get up in front of an audience and recite something from a real play. That means you can't just read your little brother's love letters, and you'd best speak up. Monologues can be done in increments of one or three minutes, and members of HATG judge you according to audience response. (Read: Drag your friends if you want a shot at winning this thing.)

The good news? If you're talented, you might get picked up by a casting agent who happens to be hanging in the audience. If you're bad—well—last we checked, Fergie's was a bar.