Cr'e Fest 2, Susquehanna Bank Center, Sun., July 19

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Cr'e Fest 2, Susquehanna Bank Center, Sun., July 19

POSTED: Tuesday, July 21, 2009, 9:11 PM

Filed Under: Music Show

I don't own any M'tley Cr'e albums and I've never went out of my way to listen to them. My appreciation for the Cr'e is ironic at worst and passing at best. I usually won't turn off the radio when they come on, I've seen the Behind the Music a couple times and I sought out the Tommy Lee/Pam Anderson sex tape because I've never seen anyone who could steer a boat with his cock before.

But here's the thing about going to see M'tley Cr'e in 2009: Everyone wants to be there. There's no cooler-than-thou arms-crossed posturing and everyone balls to the wall happy that they get to relive 1989 for a couple hours on a Sunday. And so is the band. Sure, a fest like this is specifically meant for acts that can't book an arena themselves to grab some cash. But it's also a chance for a largely working class audience to see an entire bill for dirt cheap. Like seriously cheap.

So for roughly the same price of buying a Cr'e CD, I got a ticket and as much tailgate-Miller Lite as I could drink (which is considerably more than anyone should have when they have to go to work the next day). Apparently other bands played, but I didn't bother to go in considering beers outside were already paid for while beers in there were not. Plus the parking lot people watching was top notch: The lot was filled with guys with well-toned. tatted arms and beer guts and women wearing a bikini tops who probably shouldn't have been. But they were all having a good time and so was I so no harm and no foul (except to that guy who yelled at us, "You guys are passing around that sun block like it's lube." First of all, there's no underestimating skin protection. And second of all: Does he often share his lube? Like, gross).

Anyone stepping/stumbling onto the lawn of the Susquehanna Bank Center got a sense of what my college dorm smelled like (um, beer and weed) and the sight of people passed out on the lawn (too many parking lot beers for you, my friends). When M'tley Cr'e began, opening up with "Dr. Feelgood," the sticky sweet smell swelled once more (as it did for "Home Sweet Home" and "Girls, Girls, Girls"). The band played all of Dr. Feelgood with some extra hits thrown in for good measure, which I didn't know until one of my concert going buddies told me, adding "Goddamn, this is just like high school!"

Hazy highlights:

1. Mick Marrs ' who looks like a an alien man-trout ' can wail.

2. Nikki Six still has feathered hair, which is to say, awesome.

3. I spent a lot of my time drunkenly imagining how M'tley Cr'e found the girls who dance in their underwear' behind them all night. I kept imagining some great Craigslist post: Band Seeks Sluts for Tour and Possible STD Insemination. Bonus points if you can think of a better one in the comments.

4. Tommy Lee got to play hype man while the pyro guys set up. "When I say M'tley, you say Cr'e!" is not a phrase I thought I'd ever get to respond too. Watching the wiry Lee hopping around the stage like an arguably more lucid Flavor Flav was pretty ridiculous. But, once again, the man can steer a boat with his dick so any "Lame!" claims need to be help up to that standard.

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Featuring everything from event roundups to concert reviews and sex talk, City Paper's Critical Mass is a space for off-the-wall coverage of Philly's A&E scene.

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