IDOL HANDS: American Idol, A Tale of Two Shitties

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IDOL HANDS: American Idol, A Tale of Two Shitties

POSTED: Thursday, April 15, 2010, 10:37 PM

Filed Under: TV Idol Hands

We like American Idol. Too much. american-idol-logo

Molly Eichel: Say buh bye to Andrew Garcia and Katie Stevens. Not a shocker for either considering they were both at the shallow end of the talent pool. While I gotta give big ups to Katie for improving in the last couple of weeks, the real tragedy here is Andrew who, as Simon pointed out during one of those Welcome to the Dollhouse-level of awkward performances, that he wasn't that talented to begin with and just happened to have a bitchin' version of "Straight Up" ready to go for the judges come Hollywood. Tommy Button: Andrew has been clinging to his Idolship by a thread for weeks now, so I have to imagine him getting the boot would almost come as a relief. I'm more upset about Aaron Kelly not going home. I actually think he's getting worse but his remaining presence is just a second reminder to all registered voters in Dade County, FL: Old people vote. And it's also a reminder of why 14-year-old girls can't vote. Katie Stevens is the one who gets the short end of the stick, though. Of all the weeks she's been on the show, this was the one she sucked least. ME: But, alas, Katie was never going to make it to the top three. She just didn't have Aaron's pedarest appeal. Sayonara, High School. My heart hurt when Big Mike was in the bottom three. He is almost destined to get the boot, unless he Jean Claude Van Dammes next week's theme, which he probably won't. TB: On a side note: Idol producers need to tone down the laser light show extravaganza during guest performances. I get it. You need something to cover up how shitty people are but believe it or not, I'd rather listen to Adam Lambert for 3 minutes than have my retinas burned out.

Jessie Bikel

Posted 2010-04-15 17:47:01

Uninspiring all around, but ME manages to take this one for gratuitous of JCVD.

Ruby

Posted 2010-04-15 17:58:48

I wish JCVD would mentor those little fuckers.

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Featuring everything from event roundups to concert reviews and sex talk, City Paper's Critical Mass is a space for off-the-wall coverage of Philly's A&E scene.

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