THE MAN CAVE: "His" take on the Golden Globes

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THE MAN CAVE: "His" take on the Golden Globes

POSTED: Monday, January 17, 2011, 9:24 PM
Filed Under: TV
Ricky Gervais taking Hollywood to task as Golden Globe host.
Ricky Gervais clearly thought it was a roast of American entertainment when he accepted the job of hosting the 68th Golden Globes. Robert Downey Jr. thought Gervais' scalding one-liners went too far. Why, oh why RDJ? Things were going so well! You were riding high on my man-crush list with your recent flourish of laid-back, cocky lead roles where you take nothing seriously and save the day. But it turns out the real RDJ finds Hollywood jokes to be "mean-spirited" to the point of having "sinister undertones." Ricky Gervais: WIN RDJ: Fail
Christian Bale: WIN
Christian Bale is managing his post-freakout-gaffe years quite nicely, by donning full grunge-era Eddie Vedder locks and laying on his thickest cockney accent during an "us hooligans are having a blast at this party" acceptance speech. He was so convincing as a regular dude having a good old time, I almost forgot that two years ago he wouldn't have thought twice about head-butting a caterer for leaving the wrong blend of herbal tea in his makeup trailer.
Natalie Portman accepting Golden Globe
The pregnant and (thankfully) not-anorexic looking Natalie Portman gave a genuine but awkward speech about how her choreographer in Black Swan "wants to sleep with me" and how her grandmother is watching in Cincinatti, tying on a buzz. In her defense, she is now married to her choreographer, and who doesn't have an sloshy Nana? So I'll let her slip by with a win because she looked good in her preggers dress and was brilliant in the insane ballet art-flick. Natalie Portman: WIN Natalie Portman's character in Black Swan: (spoiler alert:) FAIL Colin Firth, who learned to speak with a speech impediment for his role in A King's Speech, managed to get through an exquisitely British acceptance speech without stuttering. Was I secretly hoping for a bit of accidental yammering? I'll never tell. Collin Firth: WIN Me: FAIL The Social Network snowballed through the awards, collecting four Globes, including Best Drama. The premier film to illuminate the digital coalescence of our collective unconscious is well on its way to being considered the most important film of the new decade. Has any other film told the tale of revolutionary social history without the vantage of decades in between? (If you're not familiar with the little start-up company called Facebook, then I'm frankly amazed that you're even reading this.) The HFPA (for making the right call!): WIN Those dudes who trusted a bitter geek with their plans for online Harvard socializing: FAIL
Chris Colfer reeling
Chris Colfer gave his best "I'm about to puke" face as his name was called for best Supporting Actor on Glee (which also won for best comedy/music series). His shaky, pre-pubescent "I don't belong here" schtick was pretty thorough, complete with cheesy love-struck nods to Natalie Portman and Julianne Moore (which came off as suspiciously over-compensatory — not that there's anything wrong with that!). Colfer: WIN Accomplished actors that lost to a kid who Justin Beiber could easily punch in the face at a laser-tag outing: FAIL
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