Turned ONN

POSTED: Monday, January 24, 2011, 4:00 PM
Filed Under: Critical Mass | TV Turned ONN
Last night the Onion News Network (ONN) premiered its half-hour series on IFC, and it was awesome. I half expected this to be an awkward, annoying, Whitest-Kids-U-Know kind of deal, but ONN brought the funnies with plenty of social criticism and their characteristic insensitivity. Admittedly, you've got to have at least a half-conscious sociopolitical awareness to enjoy this show. Here's some of the highlights:
theonion.com
- After a photogenic white high school student stabs her classmate to death with a screwdriver, the judge is so appalled by the violence of her crime that he has her tried as a 300-pound Black man. Tears and outrage on the suspect's part ensue, and periodic updates inform us that white supremacists have shot her — but being a Black man, police probably won't investigate. - Then, Brooke Alvarez (right), one of ONN's news anchors is kidnapped by terrorists and we're informed, tragically, that she looks terrible. No worries, though. ONN drops a hair and makeup team into Kandahar — hoping they'll be kidnapped as well — because this anchor's blood and tears are starting to "make her face look shiny." If only it was one of the pale, hairy staffers, Alvarez wishes. - The Kim Jong Il bit wasn't that funny, with the dictator promising to call off the nukes if he can play every part in the next Batman movie. - But I loved the scathing bit with the history teacher who corrects ONN on the age of the Alamo. ONN thanks her for taking time out of her busy social life, which research shows includes looking up recipes and sleeping alone while her husband has sex with a woman he met on Craigslist ...
Michael S.
Posted 2011-01-24 14:03:28
I'm so excited for this.  I've watched the ONN segments on their website for quite some time and so it's just natural that they finally launched their own ONN show.  IFC seems like a perfect fit, too.  Now that I've setup my DISH Network DVR to record all episodes I'm set.  Probably not going to watch it at home as I'll end up saving this for my downtime when I'm away from home to watch on my phone or laptop.  That's why I love being a DISH Network customer and employee - they have a true TV Everywhere solution that allows me to watch my live TV and recordings on the go, whenever I want.
Michael iSan Idiot
Posted 2011-01-24 21:54:19
You, sir, are an idiot.  And DISH suuucks!!!  Please go sell your crap door-to-door somewhere else.
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