The next item up for grabs in our Ultimate Summer Fun Guide giveaway is the July's ruby rollerblades, emblazoned from heel to toe with red blingy things. Keep in mind, these are made for dolls, so you won't be scoring a pair of skates that fit — unless you're a wee little tiny person. They would look rad dangling from your rear-view mirror, though!
To win, send firstname.lastname@example.org a haiku about ruby rollerblades by 5 p.m. on Tue., May 29. Make it funny, please!
Bedazzling by Brenna Adams
Photo by Neal Santos
To celebrate the release of our 2012 Ultimate Summer Fun Guide, we're giving away the bedazzled goods that decorate the opening page of each calendar month. First up: May's shades, bedazzled with emeralds (May's birthstone) and lots of other little shiny things. To win, write a haiku about them and send it to email@example.com by tomorrow (May 25) at 5 p.m.
Bedazzlng courtesy of Brenna Adams.
Photo courtesty of Neal Santos
We have two tickets to see Brooklyn-based comedian and musician Reggie Watts at the Troc (1003 Arch St., 215-922-6888) on Saturday. To snag them, submit a Watts-related haiku to firstname.lastname@example.org by 10 a.m. tomorrow morning. We'll pick and announce a winner by noon.
Also, check this space tomorrow afternoon for LOL With It columnist Ryan Carey's Q&A with Watts, where they talk about superheroes, psychedelic comedy and what it's like to eat pot brownies on live TV. Mmmm!
Thank you to everybody who submitted to our Santigold ticket giveaway contest. Your haikus were wonderful and your syllables were well accounted for. I’m not sure why, but we care more about syllables than spelling around here. Big props and two tickets to our winner Bill K, whose upfront approach won our hearts. Santigold plays the Troc on Tuesday.
Gimmie them tickets
to the Santigold concert
so I can get laid
And below are the runners up. They don’t win tickets, but we didn’t want their efforts to go unrecognized.
It's that simple. Write a haiku about Santigold and send it to email@example.com with the subject "GIMME SANTIGOLD TICKETS." We'll pick our favorites and put you on the list with a plus one. Deadline is Thursday @ 5 p.m.
Also, stay tuned to Critical Mass. We're posting A.D. Amorosi's interview with Santi tomorrow. We'll announce the winning haiku on Friday. And yes, we'll be counting syllables.
Santigold plays Tue., May 8, 8 p.m., $29.50, The Trocadero, 1003 Arch St., 215-922-6888, thetroc.com.
We have a pair of tickets to see LMFAO and the Party Rock Crew and a whole slew of special guests at the Sorry For Rocking Party Tour at the Wells Fargo Center on Sat., June 30. To win, send a photo of someone in the most ridiculous workout getup imaginable — it can be you, your best friend, your granny, whatever. We all have to work out, right? We'll share the photos on our Twitter/Critical Mass page and announce the winner on Fri., June 1.
So get that Instagram fired up and start clicking. All entries should be emailed to firstname.lastname@example.org by Thu., May 31. Be sure to include your Twitter name so we can "@" you when we tweet your sexy photo.
Tour deets: Sat., June 30, 7 p.m., $35-$69.50, with Far East Movement, The Quest Crew, Sidney Samson, Evan Simmons and Natalia KillsWells Fargo Center, 3601 S. Broad St., $35-$69.50, livenation.com.
"Elliott Brood (a band, not a person) hail from Toronto, but they sure know how to hit that elusive Americana sweet spot between roots-folk heart and rock 'n' roll muscle. By turns punkish and tender, Days Into Years (Paper Bag) — reportedly inspired by time spent visiting WWI cemeteries and battlefields in France — has its share of banjo and mandolin, but what really hits it home is Mark Sasso's mean, sinewy guitar work and richly gritty (and warmly harmonized) lead vocals."
We have a pair of tickets to give away to the first person who can use as many letters in the name "ELLIOTT BROOD" to spell something hilarious. Bonus points to the one who can tie in St. Patrick's Day. I see something that screams "green"!
Email your answer to email@example.com by Fri., March 16 a 4 p.m.
Sat., March 17, 9 p.m., $10, with The Pack A.D. and The Timid Roosevelts, North Star Bar, 2639 Poplar St., 215-787-0488, northstarbar.com.
Image submitted by winner Sara Hirschler
Earlier in the week I asked folks to send me hippy- and Hawaii-themed haikus to win tickets to the Philadelphia International Flower Show, themed Hawaii: Islands of Aloha. We got lots of good entries, but only three can win. The following readers get a pair of tickets for their creativity and overall giggle-worthiness. Thanks, guy and gals. Enjoy the flower show. I hope you get leid.
Jeff: Gidget is Surfing / Around Oahu she goes / Go Gidget Go! Yes!
Sara Hirschler: Spicoli in Kau,/ Stoked on gnarly waves until / Mr. Hand arrives
Nina Marie: Cheech & Chong get leis / on top of a volcano / High on Hawaii
March 4-11, various times, $27, Pennsylvania Convention Center, 12th and Arch streets, theflowershow.com.
Actually, there's a decent reason. Some cover stories got moved around on the big board and the Fiction/Poetry Issue will now be April 5, meaning we have a little more time to get these things organized, read, judged, argued over, copy edited, illustrated, etc. So.
The new deadline is Wednesday, March 7, 5 p.m.
That's not a postmarked-by deadline, that's when we need to have your entries in our hands. It's just one extra week. Get writing! Submit today!
Of course, you need to know a lot more than just the deadline. Go here for all the rules and stuff.
We named this year's fiction judge a little bit ago. It's Duane Swierczynski, former City Paper editor in chief and a the author of cult fave crime novels like The Wheelman, The Blonde and more. The new one, Point and Shoot, which comes out March 7. He has killed a lot of people (only on paper, far as we know).
Well, we finally have a poetry judge! Meet Brian Teare (pictured), award-winning poet and assistant prof at Temple University. He's been published in Volt, Ploughshares, American Poetry Review and a bunch of other places. He's the author of three collections so far, and his fourth, Companion Grasses, comes out next year.
So there it is. The people you need to impress. The deadline is Feb. 29. The rest of the info you need is right here.
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