|
|
|
Archive: March, 2010
We like American Idol. Too much.
ME: So Usher takes on the Idol for R&B/Soul night.
TB: I'm not sure if this is true for everyone, but I only where my shades indoors when I'm really high or really annoyed. He seemed to be in good spirits though, so I'm just gunna assume Usher was blazing the whole time.
ME: He may have been digging it but I thought it was so long. Did this show feel like Silly Putty being pulled until it just sinks in the middle? Let's speed it up, people. You aren't as witty as you think you are and two hours takes up a lot of my time ... to watch other TV shows.
TB: I still don't understand how there can be fewer and fewer contestants each week but the show gets longer and longer. If AI insist on jamming 90 minutes of bullshit down my throat they could find something a little less awkward than the post performance interview.
ME: I actually like those.
TB: Sure, it seems like a good idea but then there is always that one terrible person who refuses to talk so we get to see them cry while being stalked by a camera.
ME: Unlike Andrew Garcia, who just thanked his momma for birthing him after that amazing performance of Chris Brown's "Forever." Finally, finally he's coming back. It's not "Straight Up" but Chris Brown is no Paula either. I'm so glad he's back in the game, even if it is due to a misogynist little cum sucker. Also, isn't this song about gum?
TB: The best song about sweets since Van Halen wrote "Ice Cream Man!" In the greater context of all-time best American Idol performances, Andrew Garcia's performance is a ripple in the pond but in the context of Andrew Garcia performances this was fucking Mozart.
ME: Sue me, but I also liked Lee Dewyze's "Treat Her Like a Lady." He made a very old-fashioned song current. Aw, Lee remember when I liked you that one week? Nostalgia! I like you again! But when he pushes his voice real hard — like many middling rock singers before him, from Eddie Vedder to Chris Cornell — he sounds like he's pushing out a giant poop.
TB: He also looked like he was pushing out a turd too. But turd face aside he did pretty well for himself. For once I didn't think he was just another lame white guy!
ME: Of course, the real shitter of the night was Tim Urban. Fuck, I don't even remember what song he did because he makes me seethe with rage. I thoroughly enjoyed how Usher was trying to subtlety say that Tim is terrible. But this week was going to be the death of Tim Urban as it is. It's hard to fake soul and when you're an empty vessel built to promote Crest white strips and abstinence.
TB: I hate Tim Urban, and seeing his failure is one of the last joys in my life. But that joy means nothing when America still votes for him. I've gotta the same about Siobhan Magnus' "Through the Fire" by Chaka Khan. I usually hate on Siobhan, you know, because she's so fucking weird. But whenever she uses "wicked" in a sentence I want to fall in love a little bit. But then again, when she sings like she sang last night, I suddenly want to headbutt a unicorn. I'm actually pretty pleased she did so poorly because it finally validated my weeks of Siobhan shit-talking.
ME: I'm glad Usher told her to keep those outfits in check. And to her credit, her face and hair were beautiful. Too bad the rest of her was a hot mess, from the boots to her weird toga dress to her voice. Not good. But I knew Siobhan wasn't going to do well this time. The banshee wail isn't that impressive when she's dealing with an original singer who has a legit voice. Her sister-in-hot-mess-arms? Didi Benami. Didi needs to keep her emotions in check. It's not funny anymore. Like, you're on American Idol. Not a character in Beaches. I would have heard this performance at my high school talent show and later in the week, someone would have written "Didi licks balls" or something in the bathroom.
TB: Somebody give Didi a whamburger and some french cries so she'll shut the fuck up. Thankfully, the performance was the least uncomfortable part of Didi's possible last moments on Idol. Seacrest was there to grill Didi about her song choice for her dead friend to the point that she almost cried.
ME: Um, did you check out the Didicrest action? He wouldn't let go of her hand. Gross, Seacrest, keep it in your pants. I guess that's this season's theme, though, 'cause everyone is still stroking it for Casey James who did Sam and Dave's "Hold On, I'm Coming." Great song choice, he sounded solid but I still don't think singer's like him exist anymore. There's a reason Johnny Lang isn't famous, and it's not because I don't have a major boner for him.
TB: Last week I actually gave Casey props for whipping out a little Huey Lewis, but really, this day in age Huey is pretty much only good for weddings and bar mitzvahs. I let Casey slide because if he had played "The Power of Love" at my wedding, I would have ended up marrying him that day. But this week, performing "Hold On, I'm Coming" started to push the cheese factor to the tipping point.
ME: Let's continue that dairy metaphor while discussing Katie Stevens' version of "Chain of Fools," shall we Tom-Tom? I think she sounded fine but she was like that Skinny Cow faux-ice cream goop my mom eats. It tastes okay, it's not bad for you, you just really wish you were eating a triple scoop with banana split. Covered in whipped cream.
TB: I still think she's caught a bad case of the boring whiteys. Maybe someone like Big Mike can sit her down and help her get over her whiteness. Because he's a good singer, guys ... He can tutor her ... He's clearly on a war path now and taking no prisoners. He plays the nice guy, but he knows what he's doing. He's in it to win it.
ME: I heaved a heavy sigh of relief when I heard he was doing "Ready for Love" by India.Arie. He could have gone so safe with this song choice, this is his wheel house but instead he went outside the box. Did he blow it out the box? Box annihilated. Know who else I kinda dug? Aaron Kelly's "Ain't No Sunshine," but that may be for song choice rather than song. He's nowhere near the best but I don't hate the little Keebler Elf anymore.
TB: In a night full of ups and downs, Aaron landed right in the middle for me. 'Meh' is the closest word in the English language that describes how I felt about that whole thing.
ME: Must we repeat another up, though? Crystal Bowersox doing "Midnight Train to Georgia." Powersox and the Pips. BAM.
TB: Saturn is the least dense planet in the solar system. It has a density of 0.687 grams/cubic centimeter. Just for comparison, water is 1 g/cm3 and the Earth is 5.52. Since Saturn is less dense than water, it would actually float like an apple if you could find a pool large enough. Just thought I'd throw in some information you didn't know rather than repeat how awesome Powersox is.
Is America going to ruin this for everyone? Why is that Tim weirdo still around? Crystal should already be making a record, what are your thoughts on the odds that she doesn't win and thus crushes my soul?
Don't worry -- after idol Tim Urban will become a US postal worker and will wind up going on a killing spree.
Neighborhood Watch finds fashionable folk all across the city. Despite early week sogginess this week, there were a surprising number of people who didn't let a little rainfall dampen their fashion parade.
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
SoLow Festival is an inexpensive artistic event dedicated to promoting new and experimental work. SoLow Festival offers a platform for original and solo performance, as well as visual work to be presented in a collective manner. Bringing together anywhere from a dozen to fifty performing artists this May 13th to 23rd, SoLow focuses on the artistic creation and growth of these artists with conceiving new work with low or no-cost risk.Developers Choinacky and Amanda Grove stress the grass-roots nature of SoLow — the fest, in the spirit of the Fringe, isn't sponsored by any umbrella organization, and is really all about community and creativity. "Hopefully, by lifting the constraint and risk of financial responsibility," according to the release, "artists will feel free to experiment, explore, and take bigger risks." The deadline to apply to the SoLow Festival is THURSDAY, APRIL 15; performances can range from 5 to 45 minutes, and they'll ask for $5 donations at the door of each performance. One hundred percent of the proceeds will go right to the artists. For more information, visit the Anthology Project's Web site, or friend SoLow on Facebook. And don't forget, the deadline for Fringe applications is this Friday, April 2. RELATED >> Calling All Artists: Spring is Deadline City
Filed Under: Movies
Horror flick site Bloody Disgusting is reporting that Neil Burger's Dark Fields, starring Jenkintown's own Bradley Cooper and Robert De Niro will be released in March 18, 2011. As the gossip hounds have reported, the film will be shot here, but shooting doesn't begin until May, so don't be surprised if that date changes.
The Playlist has a good description of the flim's plot up:
The film, starring Bradley Cooper, Abbie Cornish and Robert De Niro, will center on a writer (Cooper) whose dependency on a designer "viagra for the brain" drug hits a stumbling block when his stocks dwindle. The writer must then venture into the drug's dark past to feed his habit all while suffering the drug's side effects of sanity-splitting headaches, spontaneous blackouts, violent outbursts. De Niro will play financial mogul pursuing Cooper while Cornish role is still unknown, presumably a love interest for Cooper.They also report this little tidbit, that I didn't know: "The film will also feature a phenomenon called "trip-switching" where time moves with a stop-motion quality which will be interesting to see on the big screen. Once a Hollywood-dumping ground for movies that couldn't survive the Award Season crush, March has become somewhat of a coveted spot as of late because of the success of movies like 300, which could gain traction despite the lack of star power that would most likely lead to a lukewarm summer opening. Then again, Paul Greengrass' Green Zone was moved to March for this reason and it did terribly at the box office. RELATED >> Bradley Cooper promises he's not an asshole
Filed Under: In Memoriam | TV
Sad to report the death of television writer/journalist David Mills, who passed away yesterday, from what some news outlets are reporting is a brain aneurysm.
Mills got his start in television penning an episode of Homicide: Life on the Streets, based on his college buddy David Simon's book of the same name. Simon would, of course, go on to create The Wire, and added Mills to its venerable writing staff (above is a clip from the Mills-penned episode "Soft Eyes," the second episode of the fourth season, which I regard to be one of the strongest seasons of television ever made). Often overlooked because of The Wire's success in prolonging the same themes into full-season arcs, is Mills and Simon's HBO miniseries The Corner, also based on a Simon book. It's an excellent mini-series and deserves a spot in any Wire fan's Netflix queue. Mills was, again, collaborating with Simon on his new HBO Treme about life in post-Katrina New Orleans, which debuts Sun., April 11. Mills also notably wrote for Kingpin, ER and NYPD Blue.
But before his work in television, Mills was a reporter. In 1989, he wrote for the Washington Times a piece on Public Enemy in which Professor Griff made antisemitic statements, leading to his ouster from the group. Author Sistah Souljah was in similar hot water after a she told Mills that violence by blacks against was justified during the 1992 LA riots. Then-president Bill Clinton criticized Souljah in a speech at the Jesse Jackson's Rainbow Coalition, leading to the coining of the phrase "The Sistah Souljah Moment."
Friend of Critical Mass and CP contributor Mike Pelusi led us to this obit by one of my favorite TV writers, Alan Sepinwall, who justly memorializes his friend.
Filed Under: Music Concert Review
As I headed to the back of a very long line in front of the First Unitarian Church this Monday night to see the XX, two things surprised me:
1) The hipster parade was thinner than I'd imagined. Sure, there were scruffed-out Devendra Banharts walking around and flannelled, vested hippie chicks, but for the most part the crowd varied in shape, color, and style.
2) The desperation: This show was sold out, and there were kids who wanted these tickets bad.
"My friend just sold his tickets for 100 bucks," claimed a Pavement-tee-d kid behind me.
We filed into the Church from the misty skies and headed to the Sanctuary. The pews were already packed to the gills. My quick-thinking boyfriend grabbed a bench out from underneath what seemed to be a foosball table and set it in front of the first row of pews. Best seats in the house.
Nosaj Thing opened the show. He's a scrawny computer manipulator who, frankly, surprised the hell out of me. He was like a surgeon — precisely caring for the body of his machine, but not afraid to get his hands dirty. I couldn't help but watch Thing's hands; his slight ones rarely left his instrument. He caressed it and groped it, fingering every crevice to bring about every sound imaginable. The result of this electronic lovemaking was a melodic soundscape that reverberated beautifully throughout the Sanctuary's walls. His sound is reminiscent of Pretty Lights, whose recent rise in popularity has brought this type of mellow, often instrumentally-inspired electronic music into the spotlight. Despite his stupid name, Nosaj Thing was captivating, filled with passion and capable of great things.
As the lights came back up post-Nosaj, I was smack dab in the middle of a fire chief's worst nightmare. People crammed themselves up and down the aisles, knees hugged to their chests. But an obstacle stood in the way of the hungry crowd: The Swedish duo jj. At first, I was a bit mystified by the bizarre band. Lead singer Elin Kastlander took the stage with barely a whispered "hello," and launched into some Norah Jones-esque vocals. She was like Courtney Love and Mama Cass and Stevie Nicks with tons of gold, glittery makeup. But the initial fascination faded quickly. Kastlander's vocals — while pretty — didn't hold up against the prerecorded bold, kinda-African eletropop that played in the background. Fellow bandmate Joakim Benon occasionally came on stage and strummed an acoustic guitar. While apparently the mastermind behind jj's "background music to life" sound, his unexplained presence was confusing and distracting.
The XX didn't make their fans wait very long after jj left the stage. As silvery lights highlighted the band, the epic bass line of "Intro" began building up into the Church's reverent air. They opened with "Crystallized," the first single from their highly-lauded debut album. The tension in the crowd was thick, almost heavy, as we waited for Romy Madley Croft's sultry vocals to inject sexiness into the song. She didn't disappoint. Croft was shyer than I'd imagined, and possessed an androgyny that did not match her angelic voice. She and bassist Oliver Sim traded off vocals as they went through the tracklist of their epynonemous album.
We were all lovers that night, as we claimed that we "never have to leave" through "Islands" chorus. Our body heat rose when Croft and Sim delivered us the "Shelter" that they promised in their song. Despite the awe-inspiring performance, I wish the XX would have been a little more playful. They didn't stray at all from the album, despite their obvious instrumental talent (especially Sim's). They need to stop taking themselves so seriously and embrace their ability to mesmerize their fans.
Maybe this is our fault, though. With defeaning silence between each song and a refusal to even stand up and groove, the crowd seemed to be attending Mass. So next time the XX is in town, we're dancing. Or at least standing up and swaying. Stage diving may even be attempted, especially during the crashing sexuality of "Infinity."
Are you with me, Philly?
great review... couldn't agree more! the xx totally killed it - despite the crowd. can't wait for them to come back to philly and hopefully play a bigger venue. i bet they'll be more playful, and i'll be there swaying along.
 |
- Fiction Winner Jessica Penzias, "Death By Oboe"
- Poetry Winner Sean Webb, "The Bridge"
- Fiction Judge Elise Juska, author of One for Sorrow, Two for Joy
- Poetry Judge Thomas Devaney, critic and author of A Series of Small Boxes
- and me, your host
This was so cool, I just love poetry. Thanks for that. I just read some great poetry from a guy named Java Bomani. He has a free preview of his book in PDF format. You can check it out at http://www.1ancientwon.com/Chocolate_cherry_milk_promo_ebook.pdf
You're welcome, Daxa. We'll have a recap up in the A.M.
 |
| phillydesignblog.com |
| Amy Orr's work |
Filed Under: Music
We have our winners! Congrats Joshua and Gabriel! See the answers:
1. The movie Lawrence of Arabia holds a curious gender-based record. What is it? The longest movie where no women have speaking roles.
2. Fanfarlo uses a Harry Houdini-esque performer in one of their videos. Name video and the performer. "The Walls are Coming Down," Roslyn Walker
3. Francis' brother is a Hari Krishna. Who founded the Krishnas and when did he found it? Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada, in 1966.
Lawrence Arabia, Fanfarlo and Robert Francis, Wed., March 31, 8 p.m., $14, all ages, First Unitarian Sanctuary, 2125 Chestnut St., 877-435-9849, r5productions.com.
Robert Francis will be appearing at Potbelly at 12th and Walnut at 6pm before the show.
Popular Posts
Search this blog:
Topics:
- Activism
- Arts
- Arts Events
- Books
- Dance
- First Person Fest
- Last Chance
- Museum
- On the Fringe
- Philly Artists
- The Curator
- Theater
- Visual Art
- Arts News
- Artist Profile
- Arts Preview
- Street Art
- Been There, Done That
- Big Ups
- Comedy
- LOL With It
- Stand-up
- Critical Mass
- DVD
- Events
- Friday Fill-in
- Ice Cubes
- In Memoriam
- Interview
- Just Do It
- Just Opened
- Kaleidoscopic
- LGBTQ
- Art Phag
- Mailbag
- Movies
- Film Fest
- Movie Review
- On set
- Scenester
- screening
- trailer!
- Music
- 10 Track Mind
- Album
- Album Review
- Concert Review
- DJs
- Local Support
- Now Hear This
- One Track Mind
- Philly Bands
- Show
- Somebody Else Was There
- Song
- The Showdown
- concert photos
- jazz
- DJ Nights Blogged
- Night Watch
- Now See This
- Poetic License
- Printed Matter
- Radio
- Shopping
- Coveted
- Fashion
- What We Heart
- TV
- 24
- Idol Hands
- Mad Men
- ProjRun
- True Blood
- Useless Lost Recaps
- Couch Potato
- Shore Trash
- Turned ONN
- TopMod
- Video Games
- Free Online Game
- PSP
- PlayStation 2
- The 1-Upper
- Wii
- Web Junk
- CAGE MATCH
- Free Online Toy
- Weekend Omnibus
- Win
