Archive: May, 2010

Letters to the Editor: Mastubating crackheads

POSTED: Saturday, May 29, 2010, 12:23 AM

Filed Under: Music

Michael T. Regan

Dave P loves a good crackhead.

Hope sends along this letter in reference to Dave P's Top 10 Making Time moments. Sure the party was last weekend but that shouldn't stop you from enjoying this addendum to P's #9 moment. For those who don't remember, Dave wrote:

One night at Transit a crackhead off the street managed to sneak in the back door of the club during the party. At some point she made it onto the dancefloor in the basement and proceeded to take ALL of her clothes off and dance for a pretty long time. The whole dancefloor cleared and the woman danced naked directly in front of the DJ booth until finally a security guard escorted her out. There was an amazing picture of the woman dancing, completely naked, with one of the guest DJs, JDH, looking very serious, probably not noticing that the only person he was playing for at the moment was a naked crackhead. I need to find that picture.

But that ain't all, says Hope. She shot us this letter:

I was lucky enough to be next to the naked crackhead in the basement at Transit, and remember a little more: she sauntered downstairs, took off her wig, dropped her tracksuit which had nothing else underneath, and started MASTURBATING. We all scootched as far as we could in the small space while she furiously abused herself and danced. Then a bouncer came up to her, politely said "Ma'am, you'll have to leave", and she calmly picked up her wig and clothes and waved like Miss America on the way out. I haven't thought of that in years, it was awesome. Thanks, Dave!

No, thank you, Hope.

True

Posted 2010-05-29 14:33:35

You dudes got punked:

http://blogs.philadelphiaweekly.com/music/2010/05/20/city-paper-article-reveals-dave-ps-best-making-time-moments-remain-completely-unchanged-from-the-same-article-we-ran-last-year/

Molly Eichel

Posted 2010-05-31 19:01:57

Aw, yes True. But where is their masturbating crackhead?

Posted by Molly Eichel @ 12:23 AM Permalink | Post a comment

Daytime Emmy's to pay tritube to Dick Clark and American Bandstand

POSTED: Friday, May 28, 2010, 9:46 PM

Filed Under: TV

We know you've been waited with bated breath for the June 27 Daytime Emmy Awards (please, like you haven't had the date penciled in forever now) so let us enlighten you. This year's Daytime Emmys will pay tribute modern day Dorian Gray Dick Clark and American Bandstand, which started right here in Philadelphia. So says Variety:

On board to pay tribute will be Barry Manilow, Garth Brooks, Simon Cowell, Jay Leno, Cher, Marie Osmond, Frankie Avalon, Ann-Margret and the Spinners. [snip] "It was time for us to talk about Dick Clark and his influence on on daytime," said Daytime Emmys exec producer David McKenzie. "He had a huge influence on television, and was a tremendous cornerstone of the music business as well. We couldn't pass up the opportunity."

The article promises a show heavy on performances that will take advantage of the telecast's new Las Vegas home, including acts like Jeff Foxworthy and Cheech and Chong (hellllooooo cultural clusterfuck!). Clark totally deserves it. Without Clark's clean-cut looking on Bandstand legitimizing the then nascent rock 'n' roll, the genre would surely never have risen to prominence as quickly as it did. Watch a golden age video above, featuring South Philly crooner Al Martino. But let's hope they don't forget about the voice who introduced the original American Bandstand, "Wee Willie" Webber, who passed away last weekend.

Rondell

Posted 2010-08-30 02:43:11

What a shame this has been deleted, we, in Australia do not get to see daytime Emmys. We love our daytime soaps, and are not catered to.

What a shame.

Posted by Molly Eichel @ 9:46 PM Permalink | Post a comment

MUSIC MADNESS: Win tickets to see the Futureheads on Wednesday -- WE HAVE OUR WINNER!

POSTED: Friday, May 28, 2010, 5:39 PM

Filed Under: Music

The Futureheads are one of those bands that are much better than they need to be. The Brit punks marry incredibly crafted harmonies to pop sensibility that isn't marred by the immaturity usually associated with the latter tag. Here's what K. Ross Hoffman had to say about them:

The Futureheads always seemed like they were having way more fun than their U.K. compatriots in the mid-'00s "angular" wave, jutting out from the somewhat dour likes of Bloc Party and Franz Ferdinand with their absurdly endearing, brusquely bouncy vocal harmonies and a choppy pop-punk urgency bordering on goofiness. That energy never really went away, despite a few albums bogged down in refinement and diminishing returns, and their newest, The Chaos (Phantasm), feels gleefully reinvigorated, living up to its overdetermined title with scrappy nuggets like the manic, chord-a-second "This Is the Life" and dead-hooky "Heartbeat Song."

And we want you to go see 'em! The first person to answer this trivia question gets two tickets to see the Futureheads at the Church this Wednesday. To enter, e-mail molly [dot] eichel [at] citypaper [dot] net. Here goes:

The Futurheads got their named from the album title of some psychedelic Oklahoma City denizens. Name the band and the album who inspired the band.

Frank correctly answered The Flaming Lips' Hit to Death in the Future Head

Contemplated the answer while listening to "Struck Dumb."

[audio:http://www.dovecoterecords.com/media/mp3s/StruckDumb.mp3]

Wed., June 2, 8 p.m., $13-$14, with The Like, First Unitarian Church, 2125 Chestnut St., 877-435-9849, r5productions.com.

Posted by Molly Eichel @ 5:39 PM Permalink | Post a comment

COVETED: An ax to grind, a tie that binds

POSTED: Thursday, May 27, 2010, 6:46 PM

Collectors of pretty things, take note: Every week, we're rounding up a what's-what of what we [heart], culled from the scores of design blogs, artist sites and Etsy treasuries we stalk on the regular. So many treats to share with you on this hot, hot Thursday:

Purchasing a pink foot-long Pocket Axe might be the closest we ever come to bearing arms. The tagline? "Hickory, steel and sex appeal." Pretty much. $95, Best Made Co. (spied first at PAPERMAG)
Confuse your dinner guests by asking them to place their wine glasses on slices of whole-wheat bread. Then laugh when they realize they're just cork coasters. Silly friends. Oiti (spied first at Desire to Inspire)

Snakes on a print! This Ryan Berkley-created I've Got a New Attitude print screams "change is good." $18, Little Paper Planes
Nan Lawson's hipster-but-not-hipster series is sweet all around, but we're particularly fond of the 5-by-7-inch I Love My Typewriter. $10, etsy.com/shop/nanlawson (spied first at The Storque)
We've never been to the Olympic peninsula, but we heart it just the same. $25, Paper Cut Works (spied first at I Heart Handmade)

Grocery lists, snarky messages, to-do lists: We have big ideas for this little Chalkboard Thought Bubble. If only we weren't left-handed. $28, Red Velvet Art (spied first at Poppytalk)
If you run a tape head over these half-cassette tape/half-thread ties, they're audible. How cool is that? This fact alone should be enough to sell you on the expensive-but-awesome Sonic Fabric Necktie. $120, Alyce Santoro via Supermarket (spied first at Design for Mankind)

PREVIOUSLY >> COVETED: Verde with envy

Posted by Carolyn Huckabay @ 6:46 PM Permalink | Post a comment

PRINTED MATTER: Arts + Entertainment, May 27

POSTED: Thursday, May 27, 2010, 3:23 PM

Filed Under: Printed Matter

The members of Free Energy contemplate cereal salad

Here's what you'll miss if you don't pick up a City Paper this week: FEATURES!

K. Ross Hoffman chats with Paul Sprangers of Free Energy in anticipation of their Friday show at the First Unitarian Church.
Holly Otterbein rounds up May's Last Chance, including exhibits at Bus Stop, Crane Arts and the ICA. Catch 'em or regret it.
A.D. Amorosi asks the members of Univox why it took so long for them to drop their lush, textured debut album.

COLUMNS!

Robin Rice heads to the Gershman Y to Re:View an exhibit all about the siren song of cartography, "Mapping: Outside/Inside."
In Hang the DJ, J. Edward Keyes compares the hyperkinetic new Janelle Monáe album, The ArchAndroid, with Nachtmystium's not-nearly-as-sexy Addicts: Black Meddle Pt. II.

REVIEWS!

Shaun Brady gives Survival of the Dead a C in this week's Flick Pick. Basically, "it's The Big Country with zombies," and that's not a good thing.
David Anthony Fox was none too pleased with Philadelphia Theatre Workshop's production of 516 (five sixteen). For a play about academia, its main character "seems to know very little about how a university works."

AND THEN THERE'S ...

Kaleidoscope quick hits on Lost States, The Harvest: Spoken Soul 215 Open Mic, Okayplayer's 10 Year Reunion, and the fiction issue of The Atlantic.
A&E Picks on Of Montreal, Black Pearl Sings, Holy Fuck and more
An Agenda section full of goodies, like Icepack, a preview of Shmitten Kitten's Mister America Pageant, Picks and Shopping Spree, newly helmed by the one and only Julia West
Our Summer Fun Guide! Make sure to take a look, and then complete all the tasks at hand.

PREVIOUSLY >> PRINTED MATTER: Arts + Entertainment, May 20

Posted by Carolyn Huckabay @ 3:23 PM Permalink | Post a comment

IDOL HANDS: American Idol, You've been Powersoxed

POSTED: Wednesday, May 26, 2010, 9:27 PM

Filed Under: TV Idol Hands

We like American Idol. Too much.

Molly Eichel: Full disclosure: My party and I totally spent the last ten minutes after Idol redialing Powersox's numbers. But we'll get to that: Lee Dewyze may have shown some pep in the last couple of weeks but he looked scared shitless last night. Starting with his rebooted "The Boxer" from inspirational night. TB: In general, Lee shit the bed last night. But he hasn't been put to pasture just yet. Voters don't tend to really vote on who sings best at the finale but rather stick to their favorite. Even if their favorite spends their his last moments on American Idol putzing around stage trying to conjure up moments of former glory. ME: But what we were looking at wasn't even end-of-season Lee. that was middle of the season Lee, before he grew the sack necessary to use bagpipes in his backing band. At first I thought we were getting the Crystal Bowersox of the last couple weeks when she pulled out her version of Janis Joplin's "Me and Bobby McGee." It was a wheelhouse song, but she still performed it better than Lee. It was like this all night: Lee was the shitty opener you talk loudly through, while Powersox was the one you came to see. TB: Way better than Lee's. And yeah, it's kind of a cop out to whip out the wheelhouse in the final round. It's just a little obvious. I mean, even the Boss closes with a different song practically each night. Give us something unexpected. ME: I'm calling unfair on Nigel's pick for the night! Lee gets a canonical song that will live forever — R.E.M.'s "Everybody Hurts" — and Powersox gets "Black Velvet"?! Are they trying make her lose? After sucking out every bit of intimacy, Simon just mind-fucked Lee during his critique, reminding him of the importance of the night and how he needed to come out swinging. He might as well have held up a kitty and said, "Do well, or the kitty gets it." Simon needed a cig after that one. TB: Hold on, Lee. Hold on. ME: Then poor Powersox had to suffer through "Black Velvet." Granted, this is probably the type of song she should have been doing all along to get the votes but it's a bullshit song, meant more for people like Nikki McKibben, who was almost asking for drug dependency when she signed on for the American Idol. Still, Powersox sun the shit out of it. TB: I didn't think it was the worst song ever but it certainly wasn't the best. It was a song that coulda been chosen by while she was still just Top 12. Sure, she gave that song a good ass kicking, but it still didn't feel like final performance material. ME: And then... And then... Lee tried to cover a U2's "Beautiful Day." Look, I don't respect Bono for much. But I respect Lee even less. TB: Great idea, Lee. Sing the anthem of the douches for your final song. Just great. ME: ...And then, with her final performance of Patty Griffin's "Up to the Mountain," Powersox gave us the moment we were hoping for all season long.

TB: Powersox just might have put the final nail in Lee's coffin. She clearly outperformed Lee, but that doesn't mean anyone in America gives a shit or that Powersox will win.

ME: So who is going to take it all? TB: If you made me call it: Lee Dewyze. ME: Agreed. Should be Powersox, probably going to be Lee. Because if there's one thing America loves, it's uncontroversial, middling rock 'n' roll.

Posted by Molly Eichel @ 9:27 PM Permalink | Post a comment

Q&A with DAVID STRATHAIRN: "We're not pushing the boundaries of reality"

POSTED: Wednesday, May 26, 2010, 7:35 PM

Filed Under: Interview Theater

Photo | James Haskins

Oscar-nominated actor David Strathairn has a firm grip on the role of VilÃ©m Rieger in Vaclav Havel's first new play in 20 years, Leaving, which makes its U.S. premiÃ¨re tonight at the Wilma. But how did he get here? Strathairn talks about the trappings of Temptation, the last Havel piece on which the actor collaborated with both the former Czech president and veteran director Jiri Zizka. City Paper: You first worked with Jiri Zizka on another Havel scripted work, Temptation. What did you think about Havel's language and ideology — and Jiri's take on it — that first go-round? How did that change with Leaving? David Strathairn: I had not been acquainted with Havel's writings before Temptation, no. It was extraordinary to read a piece as fantastical and imagined as Temptation, coming as it did from a head of state. As Jiri imagined it, Temptation was quite an Orwellian kind of Faustian exploration into what happens to those characters — much in the same way as Leaving has an intriguing cross-pollination of politics and fantastic personal reality at its heart. CP: I saw Temptation. Would you agree that Leaving has a lighter, more loving center than Temptation did? DS: Well, it's certainly not as intense as Temptation was. CP: Nor as absurd. DS: Yeah. Leaving, as we're developing it, has all the trappings of Temptation, only they're not presented with the same sort of explosiveness. We're not pushing the boundaries of reality, though the set is quite evocative and metaphysical. ... It has as wild a blend as Temptation but it's just a bit gentler. CP: This isn't your first time working with this director. What attracts you to Jiri's work? DS: He chooses potent material. The four times I worked with him — Cherry Docs and Every Good Boy Deserves Favour included — are vital and important stories and pieces of theater. They're tough to ask people to sit through. Cherry Docs in particular — he really lifted it off the paper. Every Good Boy at the Kimmel — that was quite daring to put all of us in the hands of an orchestra. His approach, at least those shows I've done him, he's well informed, there's a context for every bit of his vision. And he's detailed. He's a very complex thinker and wants to bring out as much as possible from the script and enhance it in a very theatrical manner. He's brave and conscientious and respectful of the material. CP: Is that true of the Rieger character in Leaving? DS: It was a challenge; all those references that Havel put in there and how to honor those references and make that person real as well as be respectful as to how Jiri wanted it — what tone he wanted to hear in a variety of potential tones. That character could go from very clownish to very serious. He's got quite a range for me to choose from.

Leaving runs May 26-June 20, $36-$55, Wilma Theater, 265 S. Broad St., 215-546-7824, wilmatheater.org.

Posted by A.D. Amorosi @ 7:35 PM Permalink | Post a comment

THE CURATOR: Lost interviews, the "service industry" and musical message machines

POSTED: Wednesday, May 26, 2010, 12:38 AM

walrusmusicblog.com

Every Tuesday, Critical Mass pokes around the blog world so you don't have to. — Sure that jumpsuit looked great on Heidi Klum, but that ill-fitting number you picked up at the Limited may leave you ... well, a bit limited. Irreference has got tips from Alanna Kalb, author of Stuff Every Woman Should Know, on how to dress to impress for much much less. — Listen up other Philly zips: The 19125 is making a bid to be the greenest in the neighborhood. Their blog offers conservation tips and highlights local events like the recent Ride Your Bike to Work Day. What do you say to that, 19146? — I'm restricting myself to only one post dedicated to Lost. The lucky winner is Geekadelphia's interview with Mira Furlan (who played — tear for the past tense — Danielle Rousseau). Turns out this badass, French-speaking, take-no-prisoners Amazon is really a Yugoslavian theater lover. That's a good actress right there. — If you look like James Franco, have a penchant for soft flannel shirts and thick-rimmed glasses and have experience in the "service industry," Philebrity has found the job for you. Looks like someone's wants a bit of man meat to make her summer run smoother. ("Uniform" is Yugoslavian for "naked"). — The Walrus takes us back to a time when RadioShack existed (or are there some in Pennsyltucky?) and the store offered some lovely musical answering machine messages. If only times were still that simple.

Posted by Kristen Humbert @ 12:38 AM Permalink | Post a comment

BIG UPS: Tina Fey will receive the Mark Twain Prize

POSTED: Tuesday, May 25, 2010, 5:04 PM

Filed Under: Big Ups | TV

Hell yeah, Tina Fey! Yesterday, the Kennedy Center announced that the current 30 Rock star/former SNL-er and erstwhile Upper Darby-ian will receive the Mark Twain Prize for Humor. From the Times:

On Tuesday the Kennedy Center announced that it would present its annual Mark Twain Prize for American Humor to Ms. Fey, the "30 Rock" star, "Saturday Night Live" alumna and occasional cribber of punch lines from her daughter, Alice. In the 13-year history of the prize, Ms. Fey will be the third woman to receive it: it was previously presented to Lily Tomlin in 2003 and Whoopi Goldberg in 2001.

What did you think of 30 Rock this season? I thought it was up and down; some episodes felt like the writers were stuck in a rut and some guest stars felt completely flat (JULIANNE MOORE), while other episodes were spot-on (like last week's season finale, above) and felt like earlier seasons. NBC is moving 30 Rock out of it's cushy post-Office timeslot next season and it will now follow Community at 8:30 p.m., and I'm honestly a little worried about it's future. It's had four years to establish an audience and, despite critical acclaim, ratings are low. So how do you think it will fare without a powerhouse lead-in (although, Community was stronger than The Office this year on the whole). No matter, though, without Tina, I wouldn't have an unnatural infatuation with Jack McBrayer or the ability to make Kabletown jokes. Therefore, I salute you. RELATED >> INTERVIEW with 30 Rock's Scott Adsit: "So now in bars across the world, you can spend 50 cents and hear Liz Lemon and Pete Hornberger yelling at you to 'shoot it up the ramp!'" RELATED >> I wouldn't bitch about my cable bill so much if I had Kabletown RELATED >> 30 Rock takes on the Comcast buy-out

Posted by Molly Eichel @ 5:04 PM Permalink | Post a comment

SHOWDOWN: Take back the fist pump!

POSTED: Monday, May 24, 2010, 10:14 PM

Filed Under: Music The Showdown

A concert a day keeps the doctor away.

Monday: The fact that Porktamer use a Venture Bros. clip in one of their songs makes them fucking awesome from the get go. The song spins out of control into spastic math rock and then they totally sample Yes, you know, the song about chess. I might have a huge boner for this electro mine field of a band, and I'm not quite sure how that even works. With OK Ikumi, My Pet Tiger, Forest World and Bouyant Sea, 8 p.m., $5 - $10, Danger Danger Gallery, 5013 Baltimore Ave. Tuesday: If your brain didn't leak out your ears from Monday's show — or even if it did — youneed to re-coop by hearing Holly Miranda's ambient and dreamy voice. It really is like butta, drifting sweetly across a soundscape of delicate synths, heartbreaking strings and fancy bells. Yes, fancy. With Grooms, 8 p.m., $10 - $12, Kung Fu Necktie, 1250 N. Front St., 215-291-4919. Wednesday: Admittedly, High Kick can come off a little, well, annoying at first. They have catchy licks and while they aren't singing about blue skies and daises, they have this happy-go-lucky sound that is obnoxious. At first. After just a few songs you may find yourself secretly letting loose and getting into the bluegrass-fused contemporary rock. You may have the urge to play a washboard. With The Groovement and Late Night Drifters, 9 p.m., FREE, Millcreek Tavern, 4200 Chester Ave., 215-222-9194. Thursday: Fang Island are just so damn likable. The Brooklynites make straight forward indie rock with peppy guitar solos. Serious guitar worshippers, here. The lyrics are just kinda there, except when they unilize the ever loved chanting boy choruses, a trick that rarely fails. With Univox, 7 p.m., $10, Barbary, 951 Frankford Ave., 215-423-8342. Friday: It's hard to describe Tim Fite's music since it tends to vary from song to song. At times he's self aware, self conscious and guarded. But then he's weird and witty, with goofy lyrics and light-hearted keys. Fite is described as a singer-songwriter, not because he he's a folkie — he's not — but probably because he sings and writes songs, and that's the easiest way to pin him down. With Wailing Wall, 7:30 p.m., $8, Kung Fu Necktie, 1250 N. Front St., 215-291-4919. Saturday: Experimental sugar poppers Of Montreal will bring their sweet, other-worldly selves to the TLA tonight, and you should be doing the same. Their beautifully layered harmonies and crazy synths will give even the worst dancer feet of soul. You know who these indie darlings are, so just go, okay? With Noot D'Noot, 9 p.m., $24, TLA, 334 South St., 215-922-1011. Sunday: The Restarts sound like a live transmission from the gutter. The punks hit hard with fiery guitars and a precious Tim Armstrong/ Lars Fredericksen-style alternating vocals. And both singers have a well perfected Tim Armstrong snarl. So, yeah, theses guys sound like Rancid. They really do. But they do a good job at it with the rebellious choruses and blinding licks that'll make any punker want to take back the fist pump. With Star Fucking Hipsters, Guilt Trip and Population Zero, 8 p.m., $10, The M Room, 15 W. Girard Ave., 215-739-5577.

Posted by Julia West @ 10:14 PM Permalink | Post a comment

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Q&A with SHARI SOLANIS: "The goal isn't pornography"
SEXY TIME Q&A: I've never had an orgasm during sex with a man — and I'm 30!
NOW SEE THIS: Transit cop arrests marijuana activist for alleged disorderly conduct.
What we're trying to do this weekend
CONCERT REVIEW: Primus (3D & quadraphonic sound) @ The Tower 10/17
Q&A with Tony Goldwyn: "Life is gray, and relationships are, too"
ICEPACK ILLUSTRATED: Indian fare rules, Dunder Mifflin lives on, Tom Jones is a god
ICEPACK ILLUSTRATED: The Archbishop meets the Geator, the Mayor goes suit shopping, Le Bec Fin fin.
Q&A with Goon’s Seann William Scott
Bradley Cooper promises he's not an asshole

About this blog

Featuring everything from event roundups to concert reviews and sex talk, City Paper's Critical Mass is a space for off-the-wall coverage of Philly's A&E scene.

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