SNACK TIME: Michelle Obama's Shake Shack debacle, Dean Martin's ultimate burger recipe, The Hitchcock Cookbook, No more kids!, and Marmite hates cuisine
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SNACK TIME: Michelle Obama's Shake Shack debacle, Dean Martin’s ultimate burger recipe, The Hitchcock Cookbook, No more kids!, and Marmite hates cuisine

- Holy beef patty, America! First Lady and healthy-food advocate Michelle Obama went to Shake Shack. As if that wasn't enough, her meal cost her 1,700 calories. How could such a vegetable champion have a burger once every 14 months? Hypocrite! In other news, Shake Shack is frickin' delicious.
- Crooner Dean Martin, famous for such songs as "That's Amore" and "Ain't That A Kick In The Head," may have had the greatest burger recipe of all time. Seriously, it’s two ingredients. Sure, there's a lack of culinary sophistication there, but that didn’t stop him from getting tons of tail.
- We all know the recipes for romantic comedies (boy meets girl, boy and girl love, conflict, resolution), horror films (all peaceful, killer emerges, lots of running/dying, killer is defeated), and BBC British dramas (long dramatic speeches, so much pent-up sexual tension). Alfred Hitchcock films are no exception. He's the Julia Child of the suspense thriller — and the recipe is perfect every time. Hitchcock, also a “part-time gourmet,” may have cooked it over and over, but did you ever get bored? No.
- Mick Vuick, owner of McDain’s Restaurant and Golf Center in Monroeville, Pa., has banned children ages 6 and under from his restaurant. His reason? They’re loud. Parents all over Monroeville are outraged by the injustice.
- Ooooh Marmite, how I loathe thee. Growing up, there was always a jar of the stuff in our cabinet, but I would never eat it, mainly because it’s gross. According to this new marketing campaign by the company (titled "Hate Cuisine"), I’ve been missing out. They’ve hired this completely real frog and snail to tell you that "oat cwezeen" is pretentious and unnecessary — all ya really need is a bit of Marmite and your food will be heavenly.
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