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| Obalma, bias-blasting lip goo. |
| Obalma.us |
Utah-based skin care company Shaka Laka celebrates the 44th President and his veep with a commemorative set of practically edible lip balms. Obama's flavor is a patriotic Red, White & Blueberry, a smoothie-style blending of raspberry, cream and blueberry with SPF 15 and vitamin E to soothe wind-whipped lips.
BidenBalm is a Ham & Cheese flavor, chosen to match the V.P.'s favorite lunch on the campaign trail. Ham and cheese on a sandwich is a reliable American combination sure to please most of the people; ham and cheese in a 2-inch oily cosmetic stick is an unholy union fit only for the olfactory-addled. Though the stick is a noncommittal white color, one whiff reveals a cold Lunchable aroma that turns the stomach as it boggles the mind.
Shaka Laka's other lip products are convincing doppelgangers for the real thing: sharp peppermint, sweet coconut and tangy citrus. They are made with healthy SPFs, natural oils and beeswax. We attribute this Ham & Cheese nonsense to press-baiting. You won, Shaka Laka. Now take this stinky stick off my desk, I don't want to touch it.
Shaka Laka lip care (including the foul Ham & Cheese balm) can be purchased online at ShakaLakaHut.com.
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