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Top Chef Masters Episode 2: No cook is an island
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Top Chef Masters Episode 2: No cook is an island
Last week, I addressed the whine flu outbreak that spread as a result of the slow-moving debut episode of Top Chef Masters. (Kelly Choi = a host in more ways than one.) While I didn't disagree with the criticisms (sticking Christopher Lee in a shitty dorm room to prep is slightly off-putting), I was confident they'd make it interesting sooner rather than later.
So how did last night's episode � which involved four superstar chefs cooking a feast themed around ABC's Lost � turn out? Let's throw that one to Aziz Ansari of Human Giant and the criminally slept-on Parks & Recreation, who discusses food stuffs regularly on his Twitter:
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I am with that.
Last night's contestants � Elizabeth Falkner (Citizen Cake/Orson in San Fran), Suzanne Tracht (L.A.'s Jar), Graham Elliott Bowles (of his eponoymous Chicago restaurant, and TCM's youngest cheftestant so far) and wd-50's Wylie Dufresne, a multi-appearance Top Chef guest judge who's been given more opportunities to talk about how much he likes eggs than I've been given to make love to a beautiful woman. Last week, I predicted that wily Wylie, he of the foodie-boner-inducing moleculargastronerd persuasion, would breeze through to the championship round of Masters based on the show's outward-bound obsession with him. Turns out � bless my tapioca malodextrin-sprinkled stars! � that I was really wrong.
Quickfire: Choi throws the four chefs a roll of quarters to recreate the infamous vending machine amuse bouche challenge from Top Chef Season 2. Judging: Former cheftestants Ilan, Betty and Michael, all of whom competed in the original. Dufresne found some time between coin feeds to explain his original life goals: "If I had my druthers, I'd be a professional athlete, but I'm not particularly fast or tall or strong," he says. (If I had my druthers, I'd ball-tap anyone who uses the word "druthers.") He earns a lackluster 3 stars out of 5 for a grilled cheese with beer nuts and a Dr. Pepper reduction. Falkner braises beef jerky for a 3.5. Though Bowles comes close to taking the challenge with his 4.5-star tuna salad with pickled shallots and orange soda froth flavored with lime leaf, lemongrass and ginger, Tracht ends up on top thanks to pitch-perfect fried shallot rings with a microgreen salad and Dr. Pepper aioli.
Elimination: Using a bunch of island-y ingredients, the foursome must cook up plates for a group of Lost staffers, including the writing team, co-creator Damon Lindelof and exec producer Carlton Cuse. Tracht is a big Lost fan, stating that she frequently sits down and watches the show for "three and a half hours" at a time. Since it's an hour-long program, that means she creates her own cliffhangers, which is masochistic. Dufresne's never seen Lost, which is probably a good thing for him because the island's mystical magnetic properties would probably prevent him from transmogrifying foie gras into a badminton racket or whatever the hell that guy likes to do.
In addition to the fresh stuff � fish, wild boar (shoutout to Locke), and various veg � the chefs are allowed to buy canned/pre-packaged products to emulate the long-shelf-life Dharma Initiative products from the show. The guests take much glee in the fact that the servers for the challenge are bedecked in Dharma jumpsuits. (This is probably the point in the program when Ansari laid his set down on his futon.)
Falkner braises and sous-vides some boar with ancho garlic rub and throws it together with a papaya yam pudding Gael Green curtly compares to baby food. Bowles, a Navy brat who grew up on the island nations of Hawaii and the Philippines (what up!), impresses with a multicultural tuna trio, including a coffee-crusted plancha-grilled loin that makes Saveur's James Oseland swoon. Dufresne does roast chicken with � yes �� his signature poached egg, along with a plaintain pur�e and some banana mustard. Lost's Lindelof likens Dufresne's offerings to "a piece of art in a museum that I don't understand," which is a totally fair criticism from a guy who's responsible for creating one of the most straightforward, easy-to-decipher shows in television history.
Tracht, who already had a big leg up from her Quickfire win, earns plaudits across the panel for her seafood risotto with uni, clams and prawns, wild boar strip with oyster beer sauce and mango corn salad. "If I was lost on an island, I'd want your instinct for flavor to get me through the dark nights," Britcrit Jay Rayner tells the Angeleno chef. Tracht ends up securing a slot in the finals alongside Episode 1 winner Hubert Keller, accruing a total of 22.5 stars. Rounding out the finish: Bowles (20.5), Dufresne (20) and Falkner (16.5), who I think got shafted a little bit.
Next week: Rick Bayless whines about quesadillas.
she gets it on DVD...no commercial breaks for four episodes = roughly 3.5 hours of watching (include a minute between episodes, plus some bathroom breaks). i know this, because that's how i watched seasons 1 and 2 off of netflix. i've since kicked the lost addiction.
Rory dropping SCIENCE!
Was Suzanne Tracht on quaaludes or WHAT? Soooo chill and her face didn't move except for her mouth. Too bad I don't write these recaps, huh? I have such good insights.
Second attempt...Gael's baby food comment=too predictable. Wylie=disappointing because he choked culinarily and I missed his f-bombs in the latter part of the show.
I have to stop reading these. It makes me feel no need to watch the show at all. This is a compliment, by the way.
how the hell did i miss this?
[...] Cook eggs with one hand behind your back, monkeys! (How did the albumen-crazed Wylie Dufresne not draw this one?) Rodriguez rightly calls the task a “circus act,” and rocks out with [...]
[...] crush object Zooey Deschanel was featured on last night’s Top Chef Masters, joining NPH and the dudes from Lost as the latest example of this miniseries’ celeb-pulling power. (”I loved her in [...]
[...] Meal Ticket :: Blog Archive :: Top Chef Masters Episode 2: No cook is an island :: Philadelphia City... mealticket.blogs.citypaper.net/blogs/mu/2009/06/18/top-chef-masters-episode-2-no-cook-is-an-island – view page – cached o • That was [DEL: un :DEL] expected: Brad Lidge blows save o • That was [DEL: un :DEL] expected: Fumo wants to pick his — From the page [...]
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