Aid or Invade

One day you're boppin' your head along to one of their catchy songs and the next day one of them is marrying your sister!

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Aid or Invade

Democratic Republic of the Congo!

Oh no! Obama done won the ’lection and now he’s gonna take our jeezuz away! And he’ll prob’ly hide our jeezuz and we’ll have to hunt for him. It’ll be like an Easter egg hunt, only there won’t be no Easter cuz that colored president done took our jeezuz! Think ’bout it.

And there won’t be no more Charlie Daniels on the radio. All we’ll be ’lowd to listen to will be NPR and Wabotai’s Circle Songs, which ain’t nuttin but a bunch of singin’ inspired by pygmy music. Shit, Luther, everyone knows that Obama is a seekrit pygmy and that the lamestream media films him from low angles to make him look tall. Think ’bout it.

And git this: Circle Songs is on the Buda Musique lable. Iffin you re’range them letters you git “i build mosques.” Or sumptin. Think ’bout it.

I don’t care iffin the music on Circle Songs is real purdy; that’s how they trick ya! One day you’re boppin’ your head along to one of their catchy songs and the next day one of them is marrying your sister! Think ’bout it. There’s a reason why these songs can be described as “hypnotic”: librul brainwashing! Hell’s bells, they might as well give away a free abortion with each copy!

Verdikt:

INVADE! The music on Circle Songs is too purdy to be trusted. It’ll lure you in with its sweet, sweet lilting rhythms and enchantin’ melodies, then the next thing you know you’ll be speaking French and watchin’ Project Runway. Think ’bout it.

(r_anonymous@citypaper.net)

Rodney Anonymous sent this to us in all caps. He can do whatever he wants at rodneyanonymous.com.

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