[-2] A bat that bit two people at a swim club in King of Prussia tests positive for rabies. All relevant parties are administered a wooden stake through the heart. Technically, this will stop the spread of the disease.
 Gov. Ed Rendell releases his new book, A Nation of Wusses: How America’s Leaders Lost the Guts to Make Us Great. Chapter titles include “Death to America,” “DIY IEDs” and “Let Me Be Very Clear About This: I Have Joined al-Qaida.”
[-4] Health officials say at least five people near Wilmington were bitten or scratched by a cat that tested positive for rabies. Time for some tax-free staking.
[-1] A wallaby is found in the woods in upstate Pennsylvania. “G’day, mite. I was on a walkabout lookin’ for bloomin’ onions and seem to ’ave lost me way. Would you be so kind as to direct me to — holy dooley! You’ve gone and staked me wee wallaby ’art, ya hoon! I’m chunderin’ blood. Would some conch call an ambo? Oh hooroo, cruel world.”
 Former Pennsylvania state House Speakers John Perzel and Bill DeWeese, convicted of separately misusing public funds, are now cellmates. And never before were the Camp Hill dominoes stakes so high.
 In his book, Gov. Rendell says that in general Mayor Nutter is a “non-wuss,” but does call him a “weenie” at least once. Because it was Rendell’s toughness that made him a great mayor from 1992 to 2000, and not the steadily climbing national economy that happens to correlate to that same period.
[-2] A federal crackdown on Chinatown buses shuts down three companies based in Philly. And the rest will come to a stop on their own.
[+2] A Russian man and a German woman win the 2012 Philadelphia International Cycling Championship. Undoing everything the Greatest Generation had accomplished.
 Mayor Nutter will be the keynote speaker this week at the Sugary Drinks Summit of 2012. Weenie.
This week’s total: -7 | Last week’s total: -3