Love/Hate

Any Friday (Sept-June) 3:10 PM: As soon as the school bell rings you and your 10 closest co-worker friends come barreling into happy hour to get your fried food and drink on. You rearrange the furniture to suit your seating pleasure and in the process giggle and apologize when you accidentally send condiments crashing and splattering all over the place. You yell over each other as if you are still standing in front of 30 bored kids. You have no idea how to order; each of you shouting over the other your staggered modified orders. Everyone MUST HAVE SEPARATE CHECKS! You YELP that your server is slow and miserable. Your server would be much more efficient and sweet as cotton candy if you followed a few simple guidelines that most of the general population in Philly seem to get.
1)Ask your work pals earlier in the day who's going to happy hour.
2)When the first person arrives to happy hour tell your server how many are in your party and he/she will be more than happy to set up a spot for you.
3)When your server asks you what you want to eat or drink, don't tell them to come back in a minute and expect that to really happen. There is a full restaurant and food and drink must be ordered and delivered to all of the other hungry and thirsty customers. Therefore, reality is it may be about 7 mins before a server's round gets back to you.
*Understanding this point should help you to understand that when your beer is at 2-fingers and the server asks if you want another, answer him/her because your server may not be back for another 7 mins and then it may take about 3 mins to order/make/deliver that drink, leaving you on empty for about 10 mins.
4)Use your indoor voice; that's for everyone in the building's sake.
5)10 people...10 SEPARATE CHECKS! REALLY! You are all friends, you each get the same exact thing EVERY WEEK. Bring some cash, some ones, fives and tens and throw your money down when you leave. Closing out 10 SEPARATE CHECKS, some cash, some credit takes a lot of time in a server's world and even more time in the world of the hungry and thirsty.
6)Don't YELP until you have successfully followed these civilized dining guidelines. I am sure that once you do, you will find that you and your server will have a pleasant experience.
Thank you and please never come again.

To the driver of the silver Mazda who hit my brother on his bicycle and never stopped-you're soulless. How do you slam into someone, send them flying into the air, run over their bike, and never even slow down? What kind of person are you? He could have died. He has facial fractures, broken fingers, he got stitches, was bleeding profusely and will be in the hospital for several days. Go die in a pit.

You always wanted to read about yourself in this section of the paper so I hope you like this letter. I like how you made me feel like an idiot for thinking we were separating for different paths when in all actuality it was because you didn't want me to know you were cheating on me. Last year you were begging to marry me, find our own place, and start planning our future and all I asked was for you to wait until I was finished my degree. This year you are taking corny lovey-dovey pictures with another woman who interestingly popped up on your Facebook before we confusingly broke up. We were together for six years and apparently that meant nothing to you. You couldn't wait to hop into a new relationship (and apparently she couldn’t wait to hop in your pants). I gave up so much for you. I forgave you for all your faults because I loved you. You knew you meant the world to me and this is how you honored that. I hope she knows that the last weekend I saw you was the weekend I was in a car accident and I really needed you. That you can’t help but let whiny whores clog up your phone and your messages. That you might be going out and doing things now but that will fade as soon as you get comfortable. That you pledged your “love” to multiple women. That you’re dirty. That you always think you’re “right”. That you’re rude and constantly talk over people. That you are all about yourself and no one else. That you are a cheater and a tiger can’t change its strips. And most importantly, you are a glorious liar. I can’t wait until karma bites you in the ass.

Sincerely, Monica (the woman you claimed to love and wanted to spend the rest of your life with)

HI, I work in the hospitality industry & I might have to put my 15-year-old dog to sleep this week. He has traveled with me cross-country 3 times. He has saved my bacon on numerous occasions spooning with me when I didn't have heat. I saved his bacon a couple of times when he got into accidental fights with a dog, and I got bit in the process. Then there were times we ate bacon and none got saved(: My point is, PLEASE don't randomly command me to smile. You should never do it to anyone. If you have never seen me before and you command me to smile, I will command you to sew a gold-sequined outfit for a monkey. So you can see how ridiculous it is. I am sad as fuck, but I will do my job and you will get your stuff. I will even be nice to you, And enjoy our interactions. You can never have any idea what anyone is going through. I would so love to come to your job and drink and comment on how well you do it while your real life peeks through.

I cut you out of my life and I couldn't be happier, but for closures' sake, brace yourself, cunt. First off, you look like Hot Topic threw up on you. Why you feel the need to put 58 pounds of makeup on, complete with fake eyelashes, just to get cigarettes from the corner store is beyond me. Get over yourself. Second, you've always been a manipulative and selfish person. Always going after the dudes I tell you I'm into. Then you tell them that I'm "insane", talking me down to make you look better. Cute considering I'm not the one with self-inflicted cuts and burns all up and down my arms and legs. The only reason these guys end up getting with you is because your legs are like a fucking Wawa..opened 24/7. You think that I'm trying to ruin your life? Pshhh..you do that all on your own, darling. Third, I could be a spiteful bitch and tell your boyfriend about all the dudes you fucked while being with him, but I actually have a life, with real friends and a real job and a jam-packed schedule. I don't have time to think of ways to "ruin your life". Lastly, you're 25 and you still get a weekly allowance. You work..2 hours a week..at your apartment..that your dad pays for!! Pathetic. Grow up. And stop using your past as an excuse for your laziness. Get a job. I'm pretty sure McDonalds is hiring. Ps. You never deserved a friend like me. Now I finally see clearly. Have a great life, bitch. I know I will. 

Old City First Friday, you are a shell of what you used to be. Gone are the crazy jazz musicians, social diversity and free-flowing wine. Flat art priced for unhappy millionaires does not enhance culture and phony shop employees can keep their free gifts (gifts given for very disingenuous reasons). I have feelings, a heart and a brain. You think you can buy me? Obviously not, or you wouldn't treat me like groupie trying to get your autograph when I tell you I'm broke. Good nature itself can't fill our void on such a non-festive night. Work is work. Work it. You'll always have your struggling yuppy friends to intterupt our conversation and humiliate me for hah hah's. That shall soothe the suffering desperate babbling bullshit that is you. You have no use for, and are not worthy of, the energy I give free of charge. I’d rather remember First Friday for what it [was], not what it’s [become].

THAT DEMONS WALK AMONG US....I met you when we were young. I saw your pain and understood your pathology. I was able to help. You took advantage of my situation and roped me in. We had a daughter, you regressed to your childhood persona. I left you but not my baby girl. You made her a pawn in your mission of vengeance. I have spent the last 15 years making sure that she didn't grow up to be another you, just as you became a more evil person than your mother. She isn't, and you will soon experience karma kicking you directly in the face. I cant think of a single person who will attend your funeral. You remain forever pathetic. Eat shit and die.

I was already seated, you and another male companion were coming down the aisle headed to your seats. You both began pontificating about poor bag placement in the overhead compartments. You were real loud and self-righteous about it too, like we all needed to learn a lesson from your little show. I'm not defending the stupidity of our society. However, all you accomplished with your disproportionate response was making yourselves look like hypercritical & pompous tools. Ones who can't overlook routine misgivings of others which don't directly affect you. I hope you don't assume that the person seated directly below an overhead bin is necessarily the owner of the bag in said bin. For the record, I put mine under the seat in front of me. The best advice I can give you two is don't live your lives like George Costanza. Go get laid once in a while.

Why are you so jealous? You have me already, we are together everyday and night. I talk to you on the phone all day at work. You come to my job every single day. You text me when I'm out of your sight or you can't reach me. In the middle of the night I need to use the bathroom, you wake up and ask if I'm ok...dam! just relax I am suffocating. I am two minutes from exiting the relationship. You hate to see me interacting with the opposite sex. You get angry and lose it! please relax.

To the cock-smoking bastard who tried to KILL me on 95N coming out of Philly on Friday: Your 70 mph swerving was so erratic I thought you were SLEEPING. I honked and flashed in the hopes of waking you up. On the pass, I discovered you HYPNOTIZED by your cell phone - probably with the other hand stroking to kiddie porn. I honked again, after which (5 miles later you pussy) you cut me off by inches and slammed on your brakes, before darting off of exit 35. Next time you try to kill someone, be sure to finish the job, b/c if we ever cross paths, I'm going to shit down your neck hole. I hope your wife gets pimped out by dope addicts and that your kids all die of brain tumors.

I don't care who your cousin is (although I do love her). That doesn't make you 21. Y But when you talk shit about the bartender being a bitch at the bar to her coworker because she carded you months ago and brag that that is the reason you don't tip her loud enough for her to hear... it's not cool. It's my job to card you buddy, and you and your scumbag drug addict boyfriend are truly hated at our establishment by many bartenders. You guys are like 14 years too late with your candy raver bullshit. Please do not bring your hula-hoops to my bar, and I hear your neighbors might want you store them in your own personal space as well. Please find another bar to enjoy your delicious stoli blueberry drinks. I heard you claim you work in the business in nolibs. If so, Shame on you!!!! Find a new bar and learn how to tip!!!!!

I can't believe that I fell for you trifling ass! After all that effort to work things out you walk out on me, never to be seen again because things were a little awkward one night? For what? So you could guiltlessly fuck one of your coworkers at the company xmas party? Ridiculous. Contrary to what I said, I DO regret trying to love you. The thought of your hideous, troll-like self makes me want to fuckin puke! I am SO glad I dumped your sorry little hobbit ass on xmas eve. Fuck the horses too!

Just when I go on thinking there is little to no kindness in the world something random happens. I lost the back of my phone the other day and someone found it. Thank goodness I put a mailing address on it. I cannot believe it was mailed back to me. Thank you so much whomever you are

You are not unloved. I love you, and respect what you do. I am the driver of a car and always aware of where you are, and the danger that me and my car are to you. I'm scared for you when it isn't me driving near you. Car drivers of Philadelphia, can we all just slow down, get off our phones, turn on our turn signals, and be more aware of the fact that a 3,000 pound machine is going to fuck up the world of some human on a bike if we don't take the responsibility right? Seriously.

Get a life and stop bitching on the internet about things not going exactly your way when you go out to eat. Seriously, a college essay's worth of whining about your experience waiting for a table during an obviously busy weekend brunch? If you must make a complaint, at least tell the truth because I refuse to be told again that I'm not accommodating when I come home with sore cheeks every day from smiling at your impatient, miserable faces. I have never treated a customer in a way even remotely close to the sad song you're selling, so you're either totally full of shit or you're mistaken about the date you came in. I painstakingly kiss ass for my pay check and I don't appreciate your bitchery. Sincerely yours, NAMELESS HOSTESS

PS. LITTLE MISS INTERNET TOUGH GIRL, YOU WANNA PUNCH ME IN THE FACE FUCKING GO FOR IT NEXT TIME YOU PUNK BITCH.

Ignorant Gal: Please take notice, you were closer to something you would not like to experience than you realize. Namely, how you drive and how you handle being called out for your dangerousness. First, you need to stop texting and driving, particularly downtown on a warm Wednesday December evening. That conduct is obviously dangerous, and it's against city law. Next, once you realize you have made an error driving, go around the block! And in particular, pull over to the LEFT side of the road where there is PARKING, and don't try and go in REVERSE AGAINST THE TRAFFIC so you can re-enter Broad Street (also against traffic) and go on your merry way. Yes, you were called out by me and the other cyclist behind me. A main reason, in addition to the above, was because you attempted to do this SUDDENLY and were also in a designated BIKE LANE. Quite apparently, you did not like this, despite the injuries you could have caused me and the other cyclist. Is this why you then chased me down with the block in your car while in the bike lane with the horn blaring and also screaming "I will kill you!!" Oh really? Well then, Princess, I need to explain some things to you in an understandable way. In particular, I carry a handgun. I am licensed to do so. It is a semiautomatic with technologically advanced hollow-point bullets. We were at close distance. With a requisite present threat, they do great damage. Especially with a good grip and a laser sighting. I am known to have both as to the handgun I carry. So don't go screaming how you will cause me grave bodily harm (see above) and don't chase me down in your deadly weapon of a car. If I were to feel threatened enough, I will at least make a demonstration of force and cause you to crap you pants. At that point and at minimum, you should feel lucky that I do not pull the trigger. On top of that, you were stupid enough to carry on the way you did in front of the cyclist witness behind you and me. He saw what went on and had my back. Think before you act. I did, so why not you?

Yo, I luv you like I ain't feel this way before but your shits drivin' me up the fucking roof nah mean? I know why I be wanting to marry you and all that, but you've got to give a man a break or something. Just one little sloppy BJ for the big man downstairs nah mean? You kno, while I was breakin' my ass tryin' to carry that goddamn piece of shit bed, you went with your "girlfriends" for the night while you left me hangin' all by myself in that fucking freezer of our bedroom to slave over our new goddamn bed. I couldn't even pick the bedset I wanted cause it don't go right with the lighting in the room, and the thread count was too damn low. I had it with this bossing me around shit and I'm make suure next time you make your on goddamn bed and you help me wit my stroke game nah mean?

In the still of the night, the dream continues, I just hanging around thinking only good thing get complicated and having fun. That night cold I was outside looking for you. I climbed up the Rocky Mountain High through the sea and from the ocean. For this silly reason, everything take one step at at time, the traffic keep us a parts. Perhaps, may be, possibly sin cause you and me a parts. The moon light is too far from the star in the sky. A matter of time, wait until the dust get settles. Why don't you share, some of your sweet thought. Beside, that would be an exciting love bed time story. This is the time to forgive! I write a poems and l say a prayer and make a promise. That I saw a Blizzard Wizard told me to make LOVE not war. Let be kid again! let go fly kite! let make a snowmen!. We clean our self up and decorating for the jolly old Hoilday. Some aromatherapy candles and cheap Martinelli's on the table would be wonderful. If you smile and grateful for what you have, you will be happy. All we both side now? My line will close soon, I need a vacation. It's begin to look like a lot like Christmas!

There's been an ongoing debate about Bridesburg's borders and I'd like to clear things up:
Bridesburg is east of I-95 and Aramingo Avenue, west of that is considered Frankford Valley. Going south on Richmond Street, it ends at the Frankford Creek (just south of the Betsy Ross Bridge), south of that is Port Richmond. Going Northwest, Bridesburg ends at the I-95 northbound on-ramp at Bridge Street. The Delaware River is to the east. Realtors should know this and stop trying to sell people houses in "Bridesburg" when they're actually in Frankford Valley or Port Richmond. It'd be nice if the local media got it right once in awhile, too.

I was running like hell to the norristown transit center to get to one of my two jobs that i work at to make ends meet. the only phone line i have is my cell phone which i was lucky enough to get a free upgrade to an Android. it fell out of my pocket and instead of turning it in you went to the Bike Trail then to Havertown and Upper Darby (GPS, asshole!)probably to cash it into a shady dealer for crack/meth money so you wouldn't have to suck SO MUCH cock to get high! Just so you know, have fun looking at the photos of the life of a much better person than you, i changed my passwords so you cant access my info, and i locked up my account so at least you wont be getting any free calls off me and i wish you could have listened to my voicemail messages i sent so you know how lucky you are that i cant find you. You are TRASH, a despicable bastard/cunt/prick who i hope the worst in life happens to you if it hasn't already! If anyone sees a lowlife using a Google Nexus S in and around the city they probably stole it from me! Fuck you, test tube babies and all their fathers or mothers, your missing link throwback bottom-of-the-bell curve family and the primordial slime from which they came and whomever you are passing diseases to in beds and alleyways right now! Die Slow and Painfully - i wish i werent an atheist cause then i could hope you burn forever in Hell! I hope you do end up in prison someday so at least you can get raped in the showers Penn State style by gangs of syphillic psycho convicts! SUCK A RANCID DONKEY DICK YOU ROTTEN THIEF!

Sometimes I breathe you in, and I know you know...For a girl who couldn't choose between the shower or the bath, ...so are you safe, now we're through? Though it's easier, because yes I too do know this, thin air still leaks a lump in the throat. You, bright blue, I knew the cut was deep, but didn't know it would burn so bad.

Your such a people pleaser. You detest me because you know I despise what you perpetuate. The pigs pay you to promote that which you hardly care about. It's called payola. This makes you somehow more noble than me? I've given birth to many things this shitty town has made it impossible for me to enjoy. I can't share my deepest thought with anyone but myself and I am [not] privilged. You don't know shit about me. There is no serendipitous socioeconomic inheritance here. I'm poor and surrounded by sad penniless people. Pain is constant and overwhelming. And the word wealthy is remote to me as your inability to feel compassion for someone who truly suffers, suffers in a way you cannot come close to fathoming. If you lived in my body you wouldn't last a day you pompous rationalist.

I had to jump thru so many hoops to drive me crazy just to get the help I needed.Thanks for complicating my life dearly. apparently you consider yourself the wizard of oz with an actual opinion. That's great, but I've never known just how incestuous things have gotten there. sure, I was a bitch, figuratively bleeding everywhere from a lot of trauma that was instead laughed at, surely, behind my back. I was seen as a waste of life or sneered at. Do you know how much I suffered? or how much I gave of myself despite being worn down? Who cares. wth? Fighting for my rights while you take your little notes is ridiculous. twisting words... maybe I should have brought my own paper & pen. The most misogynous operation fail ever. you didn't 'care' about me. ever. Just took words from the wizard when all i wanted to live was a peaceful life & while dealing with my situation. Explanations meant nothing to you. It's not fun, but it's all I got. I made a couple of human mistakes & got labelled forever. Just because i try to slap a smile on my face doesn't mean i'm enjoying the 'easy life'. I do what I can, when I can.

All your little getaways are just a change of location...problem is, you have to come back to the reality that it's over. you are weak and broken, physically and emotionally. have fun in your loveless relationship with someone who only wanted to "win." you're a lucky guy and i think you're just the "man" for her.

You are a rude, old, insecure loser with a giant fucking nose. Everytime I have come into your store, you have been an unwelcoming asshole to me. All of my friends have compared notes, and we all feel the same way. You're rude! Try smiling sometime. It must suck owning a disgusting thrift store, that no one shops at, but still....try smiling sometime, you psycho.

-Former Customer

In my dreams,I saw you in my the bedroom laying naked on the bed. While you was asleep I walked up to you and whispered in your right ear. You say I think you're one great person, thoughtful,warm and fun,you're kind and loving, you're beautiful soul l agree. For this reason, I kiss you deeply enough into you mouth. mmm honeysuckle baby.. It tastes like honey. I heard your heart beats softly. Suddenly, I saw you're eyes glistened with tear. Emotionally. Then you wake up. I know that you are very patience and with great understanding up to this point. You survived this far mean that you discover yourself to be a greater person by far than you ever dreamed yourself to be. I really love to embrace you so much for this! Congratulation to you baby! So,free yourself if you like or I free myself to find someone who truly cares. I hope you are the One then we can move on. I would love to play Twister game with you. We needs to spend sometime alone. In Fact, we can connect better with someone who really love you. Besides, i will be waiting for you in that corner...You tell me. Just show me how to love you. I alway be humble about it. keep your heart open and same for me it will be filled. I can't wait to see you. I missed you. Celfe viande est bonne.:)

Its been since the end of july since it ended and i been on dates with boys and girls... nothing compares to your kiss, your interests, or you. Our anniversary is coming up in December, day after christmas and i would do anything to feel the love i felt once before. I wish i didn't go through major surgeries that changed my life but it happened for the best and I'm happy in the place i have gone too. But there is still that missing piece. You. I would marry you in a heart beat. I felt love for the first time, which i thought i was emotionally disconnected from and now that i know it... its cruel. I never want to love anyone again, nor think its possible. I just want you, forever. I wish things could change in our lives for it to work. I'm still missing something, without you.

I was skating down South Street one week night, extremely depressed. I tripped up on some gravel and did a face plant, and didn't want to get up. I laid there bruised and battered for a full minute and you walked over and helped me up. You didn't just take my hand; one pulled my arm up, while the other lifted me up by my torso back onto my feet. A third man retrieved my board. Thank you for showing me that there is genuine random human kindness in this world. You lifted me onto my feet - and my soul started to lift itself up out of the dark.

What a mess. You are in love with me and everyone knows it. Now that she likes you, you’re going to try and forget about me? You guys can have each other for all I’m concerned. You deserve each other. The only reason I was nice to you was to get close to him, and it worked. Now you think you possess me? Well you don’t, and never will. You may trick others with your big words but not me, I see right through you. I can’t wait till the two of you are together so I can finally be with him.

You: the two ignorant bitches in your shiny SUV tonight at 43rd and Locust. Me: riding on my bike, on an EMPTY TWO LANE street, carrying an overloaded pack on my back, a giant sketchpad and papers under my arm, and a shopping bag with two half-gallons of milk for my baby hanging from my fingers. What you did: waited to get 3 feet behind me before leaning full force on your horn and scaring the shit out of me so I almost fell off my bike. Your horn continued to blare until I pulled over. Infuriated, I rolled up behind you at the stoplight and looked you in the eye. "I know you," I said. That's right, now I'm a person and you've seen my face and I've seen yours. Your response was "GET THE FUCK OUT THE STREET!" I tried to explain to you that a bike had every right to be in the street that you had, but I was not prepared for your extremely informed and well thought-out retort: "GET THE FUCK OUT THE STREET! IT AIN'T NO BIKE LANE HERE!" Clearly you were right, especially since you repeated that masterfully crafted phrase again and again, each time louder than the last. Or were you? Right now, thousands of intelligent, educated people are reading this, shaking their heads, and thinking, "What a complete and total waste of space those two women are." I just want to emphasize here that it was a TWO LANE STREET and totally empty, so you could have easily driven past me. But no, you chose to harass me and nearly injure me. So guess what? When I came up behind you, I memorized your plate. Now it seems you've learned two lessons from this encounter: 1) bikes are street-legal vehicles, and 2) replacing your windshield is expensive.

I have known you for a long time and I can honestly say that you are a dirty low down hoe who don’t give a damn about no one but yourself. You mess around with other woman’s men and you don’t seem be concerned if they are married or in a committed relationship. You relocated here from another state to be with a man who didn’t want you here. You were just a booty call girl a fucking convenience. Do you know that you were a big joke to him and his boys you stupid bitch. You weren’t the only one in his life. Why do you think he never took you out in public or that you never met his family? Don’t you know that if a man doesn’t take you home to his mother that you’re not the one! You’ve dated him for 3 years but yet you had never even been to his house. What does that fucking tell you? And then you had the nerve to give him an ultimatum to married you by 2011 or else. I mean what the hell! Who does that? You are a dumb bitch! When 2011 rolled around he dropped you like a damn hot potato. You were not the one bitch! You walk around like your shit don’t stink and speaking ill of other people like you are above everybody else. Always trying to take what doesn’t belong to you and now here you are again with another women’s man and you don’t give a damn except satisfying your own dirty needs. You dumb bitch this man is living with another woman but you don’t seem to care you are a stupid ignorant bitch. You don’t respect women or yourself for that matter. If you can do that to other women then you would probably do it to me. I have lost all respect for you and I can honestly say that you are no friend of mine! What you’re doing is not right but that ok because what you do in the dark will come to light sooner or later.

I promise to love you, all the days of our lives. You are the best traveling partner and the best chef! I'm proud to finally call you my husband! From the first time I met you and refused to give you my number, to the first time you made me touch your huge cock, I knew there was somethang special about you. I'm glad I was right! You are spectacular!

Do you realize that you are hurtling through space via a rock traveling thousands of miles per hour? That your very existence is an incalculably implausible miracle of genetics and probability and evolution? That for millions of years your ancestors managed to procreate and create the very specific next generation that would beget another? And that its gone on for as long as life has existed on this planet? that the time you spend on this planet is less than a percentage of the length of your ancestry? That every particle that makes up your measly little human body manages to hold together, with the right amount of biochemistry and all that nonsense. Do you know that despite all this amazing things, our people still suffers? That many of us can't even enjoy the benefits of a meal, the freedom to express ourselves and bear our deepest thoughts and feelings to whomever we desire, that some dont get to even enjoy their child's birth? that some witness this miracle, only to have it become a burden, a liability? That even despite anything happening on your worst day, some will have it immeasurably worse? I guess what I'm saying is, with all the amazing, almost fantastic things in the universe, with your absolutely serendipitous socioeconomic inheritance of living among the world's wealthiest people. Why. The. Fuck. are you still holding onto stupid petty shit? Jesus fucking christ, bitch, give it up.

Yo, morning 48 Bus dude with the same brown hoodie and greasy hair every day: A couple times lately when I got on the bus and took a seat behind you, you immediately got up and sat further up the bus as though I smell or something. WTF? Let’s get this straight: I shower every morning; you look challenged in that department. It’s first thing in the morning and I really don’t notice where I sit. I’m straight, so I’m not cruising you. I will sit where I goddamn please on a public conveyance. If you want your personal space then drive a fucking car. Here’s the best part: From now on, you can bet I’ll be sitting behind you every morning so I can watch you get up and make an ass out of yourself. Any time you want to talk about this like a real man, let me know. See you tomorrow at 7:30!

I keep remembering that you're away, every time I think of you. doing laundry, unmaking the bed, I pulled up the red stained blanket and was suddenly in the midst of a memory of love-making with you, complete with groans of pleasure - then remembered, once again, that you were gone and gathered the rest to take downstairs. I get good feelings in laundry rooms, even that one with its drippy pipes and moldy rottenness – that uplifting feeling of getting things clean and fresh. when the cycles were complete and hauled back upstairs, I spread the blue blanket on the bed this time, and as I smoothed over the edges of my futon, I smiled, looking forward to the new stains. baby, how shall we live? What do you want to do in life? what are your dreams? I miss you so much that I must skip ahead in my mind, to when we’re together again. my laundry is done, bed clean, food bought. while you’re gone, I’ll put down my dreams until you return. I love you.